If we go back to stars

If we go back to stars

James/Quade

Absolute, total and utter AU.

James and Quade are half-brothers. This story follows them along their lives. Incest warning.

This fic's been my baby for awhile now. Please tread kindly :)

Chapter 1.

They're brothers. Not that anyone would be able to tell. They look so different. Quade, with his dark skin and green eyes and James, golden haired and blue-eyed. They like it that people can't tell. Prefer it, infact.

---

When Quade is 13 and James 11, their mom brings home her latest boyfriend. They are used to it by now, given it happens every few months or so. And they've learnt now to stay out of their way and haunt their own corners of the house. James would always curl up in Quade's arms and listen to whatever story Quade makes up on the spot. His voice low enough not to bring the adults down on them but high enough that James doesn’t have to hear the sounds coming from the other room.

The new boyfriend is of no great importance until he starts paying attention to James.

"Well you're a pretty one aren't you?" he'd say and reach out to ruffle James's hair or pat him on the back. James always squirms out of reach and hides behind Quade.

Quade has always been protective of James, loves him to the exclusion of everything else. And Quade hates Russel. Hates the way his eyes follows James. Hates how he tries to touch him whenever he could.

Quade is 13 and although he's tall for his age, he is nowhere near big enough to take on Russel, who is six foot something and going on overweight. None of this matters because James is his' and Quade would never let anything hurt him.

---

He's just come in from hanging the washing when he finds Russel kneeling infront of James, one hand in his hair and the other on his shoulder. James pulls himself out of the man's grip the moment Quade comes in, running in to his arms and burying his face in Quade's chest.

Quade holds his brother close and glares at Russel, who stands up, anger colouring his face.

Quade pulls back from his brother a little, meeting James's blue eyes.

"Hey James, go wait for me in the room okay"

James shakes his head, clutching on to Quade's shirt.

Quade kisses his hair.

"I'll be there in a few minutes, I promise"

When James reluctantly leaves, Quade stands up straight and faces Russel.

"Stay away from my brother"

"Are you telling me what to do? You little runt!"

Quade would do anything for his brother. Standing up to a man three times his size is not something he has to think twice about.

---

James knows the sacrifice his brother is making. He kisses every bruise he finds trying to make them better. He loves Quade. It has always been the two of them. Always. Their mother is sometimes there but often not. It has been Quade who looks after him. Quade who makes sure that he had enough to eat, who brushes his hair and holds him close at night.

Quade is his home, his safe haven. As long as he has Quade, James doesn't need anyone else.

---

When Quade is 16 and James, 14, they share their first kiss.

It has been coming for some time.

James is jealous of all the girls hanging around Quade at school. Quade, who's grown taller with his golden skin and piercing green eyes is simply put, stunning. A fact no one at school has failed to miss. And even though Quade never pays any attention to any of it, James still finds it unbearable to watch them around his brother.

Quade takes his brother's concerns quite lightly until he realises James is serious.

"James, hey…" Quade takes James's face in both hands, fingers threading through the golden hair.

"I don't care about them"

"Right"

"There are 6 billion people on this planet. Do you know how many of them I actually care about?"

James watches him, blue eyes wide.

"Just you" Quade says and kisses him.

James opens his eyes and Quade's heart starts beating again.

"Quade" James whispers wonderingly. Quade smiles.

"Just you"

James smiles and kisses him tentatively.

"I believe you now"

---

"I hated your father and I hate you!"

Quade flinches and takes a step back. So much anger in his mother's voice. So much hate. Quade has never gotten used to this, even if it happened more often than he could count.

"Mom…" he says, trying to get her to calm down.

"Don't touch me!" she yells and stumbles as she reaches for the fridge.

Quade hesitates before putting a hand on her back to steady her. She whips away from him.

"Get away from me!" she snaps and Quade holds up his hands and moves back.

"Mom, calm down" Quade feels James's hand on his back before he hears him.

"You think you can tell me what to do? Think I don't know what you are?" her furious eyes flicker between them both.

"I don't want you in my house! Get out! Get out!" she yells, hands flailing.

Quade feels James's hand on his wrist and he looks at his brother.

"Come on"

Quade is almost 18 and James is 15.

---

"I think she knows" James says, hands pillowed under his head as he looks up at the stars.

Quade turns his head and looks at him. The light from the street lights barely reach the park but he's close enough to his brother to see the pale face in the darkening evening light.

"We should leave" Quade says, finally voicing the thought that's been rattling around in his head for a while now.

James turns his head to meet his eyes.

"What about mom?'

"She hates us" Quade looks up, thankful for the warm summer night and the clear skies.

"She's just…" James tries, "she's our mom, Quade! We can't just abandon her!"

"She just kicked us out, James"

"She was just...she was drunk, Quade. She won't remember it in the morning. And even if we leave, where would we go?"

Quade props up on an elbow and looks down at his brother. The dark blonde hair spread over the grass and the eyes that are so blue, he can even see them in this darkness.

James smiles, reaching up a hand to touch his face, fingers ghosting over his lips.

"I'm old enough now and I've got some money saved up. We can rent a place" Quade catches James's hand and kisses the fingers.

"I can get another job and-"

"No" Quade cuts him off, "you have to finish school"

"Quade-"

"We're not gonna argue about this, James. You're finishing school and that's it!"

"I don't get a say? You don't have to do this on your own. I can help"

Quade smiles and kisses James gently.

"I know you can. But I need you to do this okay? For me"

"That's not fair"

"I'm your brother. Who says I have to play fair?"

They spend the night at the park.

To be continued.